[Clara and Timothy are quietly eating clementines for breakfast.]
Clara (suddenly, pointing): F-HOLE!!
T: …
T: …
T: …
T: …What?!
C: Your clementine peel. It looks like a violin’s F-hole.
T: … Oh! … Yes… Yes, it does. Of course that’s what you meant…
Clara: I love school, and going to sleep. They are two of my favorite things. But I like school best.
[as recorded by Catharine O’Neill, some months ago]
Clara: I’m glad we’re past the snake.
Timothy: What snake? I didn’t see a snake.
C: That black hose. It looks like a snake so I call it the snake hose.
T: Aah, yes.
C: I like you, Dad.
T: Oh, I like you too, Clara.
C: I think I’m going to like you all my life.
[as recorded by Catharine O’Neill, some months ago]
Clara: I found a jewel. When I have my bath, I’ll be a mermaid. You can hide the jewel in the bath. Then I can find it at the bottom of the ocean.
Timothy: OK. I’ll hide it when you’re not looking, or even thinking about it.
C: OK. (pause) It’s time to hide the jewel now.
T: Wasn’t I supposed to hide it when you’re not thinking about it?
C: Don’t worry, I’m not thinking about it.
[Clara is ready to go to sleep. Whispering with Dad.]
C: Dad? I love you [deep breath] two thousand, a million, a hundred, a zillion, two thousand, a million, a hundred, a zillion, two thousand, a million, a hundred, a zillion… dollars.
T: Wow! That’s a lot.
(pause)
C: Um, I’m not actually paying you that money. It’s just how much I love you.
T: Oh, I understand.
(pause)
C: But if I had that much money, I’d give it all…
(pause)
C: I’d give half of it…
(pause)
C: I’d give a lot of it to you.
T: There’s not much left that I can teach you, is there?
(Clara enters, holding a hammer.)
Clara: Dad? Just to let you know: I would never, never hit you on the head with a hammer.
Timothy: That’s… good…?
C: And not even Mom either!
(exits)
If a meteorite didn’t hit Earth, would it be a meteor-wrong?
[preceded yesterday by a discussion of how fast a kiss goes when you blow it, and by lots of instances of Dad looking up facts on his smart phone; Clara’s phone is a non-functional Motorola flip phone that we found in the street]
Clara: Oh, Dad: so I looked it up on my phone, and blowing kisses go at 30 miles per hour.
Timothy: Ah! Good to know. That’s pretty fast. I guess it’s OK, though, because they’re so light.