timothyweber.org

(the photos below and more are in a gallery of Oscar photos)

I first met Oscar at a party given by Mary Crinnin. I was playing guitar, and he came up and sat next to me all while I was playing. read more...

[as recorded by Catharine O’Neill, some months ago]

Clara: I found a jewel. When I have my bath, I’ll be a mermaid. You can hide the jewel in the bath. Then I can find it at the bottom of the ocean.

Timothy: OK. I’ll hide it when you’re not looking, or even thinking about it.

C: OK. (pause) It’s time to hide the jewel now.

T: Wasn’t I supposed to hide it when you’re not thinking about it?

C: Don’t worry, I’m not thinking about it.

[Clara is ready to go to sleep. Whispering with Dad.]

C: Dad? I love you [deep breath] two thousand, a million, a hundred, a zillion, two thousand, a million, a hundred, a zillion, two thousand, a million, a hundred, a zillion… dollars.

T: Wow! That’s a lot.

(pause)

C: Um, I’m not actually paying you that money. It’s just how much I love you.

T: Oh, I understand.

(pause)

C: But if I had that much money, I’d give it all…

(pause)

C: I’d give half of it…

(pause)

C: I’d give a lot of it to you.

T: There’s not much left that I can teach you, is there?

Some people are not men (it’s true). Some men don’t shave (or trim their beards in any way). Some don’t use electric shavers (or beard trimmers). All those people may not find this article the least interesting.

Those who do use electric shavers (and I will use that word to include ‘trimmers’ henceforth for simplicity), however, are likely familiar with the dominant shaver design paradigm: the cordless shaver. read more...

[preceded yesterday by a discussion of how fast a kiss goes when you blow it, and by lots of instances of Dad looking up facts on his smart phone; Clara’s phone is a non-functional Motorola flip phone that we found in the street]

Clara: Oh, Dad: so I looked it up on my phone, and blowing kisses go at 30 miles per hour.

Timothy: Ah! Good to know. That’s pretty fast. I guess it’s OK, though, because they’re so light.

Clara (walking with her umbrella): It’s a nice day today.

Timothy: Yes, it is.

C: The rain is so nice.

T: I think so too.

(“It’s my new poem,” Clara explains.)

Henry Hobbes went to town
Making spirits bright
Along came Santa Bear
With light bulbs all around him
And clocks all around them.

(Clara is getting up at night to pee. She holds a small cat robot as she sits on the toilet. She is not entirely awake, and very groggy.)

Clara: Mom?

Katherine: Yes?

C: (pause) Mom—…

K: Yes.

C: The only thing… (pause) that Kitty likes…

(long pause)

K: Yes?

C: … is the smell…

(long, long pause)

C: … of wildflowers.

I’ve now got the first batch of songs moved over from my old music page. It’s my most recent album (now nine years old), called off line. Took me a while to work out the right way to represent songs and albums in the Drupal content management system, but now it’s all quite easy to deal with and I hope that (and my weakness for shiny new technologies) will help accelerate the process.

(As Dad sings the first of the usual bedtime songs, Clara has her eyes closed but is smiling. He finishes the first song.)

Clara: Dad? You know why I was smiling?

Timothy: No, why?

C: It was because I had a funny dream that made me happy.

T: Uh huh?

C: I dreamed I was Obama. (rolls over, goes to sleep)

Clara: Dad, when’s Arthur Lutha Kid’s Day?

Timothy: Uh… what? read more...

[Clara hears the news.]

Clara: I think we should get some flowers for [Grandma] Nanny to cheer her up.

Timothy: Yeah, actually, I think that’s a great idea. read more...

Clara: Mom, I can count in Spanish. Uno, dos, tres, quatro, fingo, seis.

Mom: Wow, that’s great!

Clara: And, do you know how to say “Yes?”

Mom: ¿En Español? ¿Como?

Clara: Nope, it’s “Si.”

[Clara is looking at a dinosaur book.]

Clara: I know what this says: “Rocky… Records. How… do we… k-now? kunnou?

Timothy: ‘Know.’ That’s a weird one - a silent K that makes the O say its name.

C: “How do we know… what dinosaurs… looked… like?” On this page there’s the skeletons. I think this skeleton is from this dinosaur. See, Dad?” read more...